i miss feeling truly alive

i miss solitude, i miss spending quality time with people who know my need for placidness even when i am around them, i miss 2k12 with the bunny roaming around 'm&s' & 'times', or stopping by for cheap ice-cream in marina square after work, or even jip period where i could go off by myself to seek my own quiet spot in the school, untouchable

& watch time elapse as people, languid bodies, drifted fortuitously about, while i sat back to watch them drift from afar - there is a distinct difference in being a spectator instead of a participant

or maybe it's because people can be really tiring to keep up with, especially relationships you would rather not keep

(smarting eyes but praise the lord i am finally done with ihist term assignment + my part of gp proj, i can cry relieved tears in the midst of fatigue & accumulative exasperation) 

(old) photos of the sea never get old